Remember back to the time when you and your partner swore in front of the altar, that you will be keeping your marriage vows in sickness and in health, for better or for worse, through thick and thin, until death do your part? Good for the two of you if you still keep those sacred vows you made on the day you were married. Unfortunately, there are couples with a failing marriage who happen to be filing for divorce after experiencing long term relationship problems. Why aren’t they asking how to have a long lasting relationship?
So why are there couples who are separating after they have taken their marriage vows? Is the marriage in trouble? There are many reasons to mention, but the most basic, and hardest to deal with, is the loss of love, respect and trust with one another. How will you trust your partner if you don’t love them? Conversely, how will you love your partner if you do not trust them? Given this most basic breakdown, you have to ask “How can I make our marriage happy and long-lasting?”
That may not a new question for every couple, as before marriage, they will probably have been asking the same thing. But now, after the wedding, it is really serious. Remember that you have sworn that you will love and take care of each other until the end of your lives. Are there ways to improve marriage, or if things have deteriorated, how to fix a marriage? If none of this works, can this marriage be saved?
As mentioned earlier, the gravest reason of divorcing couples is the lack of love and trust. So what will you do to maintain, or if lost, bring it back into your relationship?
You must always have open and direct communication. One of the reasons that trust is lost is from miscommunication. You must learn how to communicate with your spouse. Be open and honest, as there will be instances where you may not be revealing your problems to your partner, but they will have already noticed it. This immediately causes them to think you have something to hide, so they do not trust you her anymore because you are not coming clean.
You need to find ways of keeping your communication going. Make sure you talk over any issues every night before you go to sleep. You can talk about what happened that day. Let them know that you want them to be included in everything you are going through, most especially in situations that relate to you both, or in cases where you have identified problems.
Be prepared to make sacrifices in some situations, and know when to hold your tongue. It is one of the secrets to enjoying a happy and long-lasting marriage. From time to time, both of you must make the effort to put your partner’s happiness and wellbeing ahead of your own.
Sometimes, the small problems can become large problems if you always try to be in charge and be the boss of the relationship. You must learn to concede the point sometimes, as nobody wants to be continually told what to do. Both parties need to be satisfied with your relationship. For instance, ask if you can clean the bathroom. If she’s not used to this, then it should put a smile on the face of your wife if you volunteer to do these things to help around the house. In addition, it also shows that you care for your partner, as everybody should be acknowledged for what they do in the relationship, and the contribution they make to ensuring the smooth running of all parts of your life. Learning how to fix marriage problems can best be avoided by keeping everyone informed and on the same wavelength.
Try to be careful with how you spend your money. It can destroy your marriage if you do not handle your financial situation carefully. When a financial crisis arises, it is important that you discuss the problem so that you are both aware of the situation you are facing, and that there are no surprises. At the same time, you need to be finding solutions together. Working as a couple on this particular issue will make you feel that each of you is an integral part of the relationship and of the decision making process.
There are many different situations that can bring on a marriage crisis. Love is what brought you together, and love and trust will be the things that bind you together. Both parties should realize that the two of you must continuously work on all of these aspects to ensure that your marriage will be happy and long-lasting through the rest of your lives.
Thanks to RescueThisRelationship.com for advice and tips.